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What is Counseling?

While there are many different kinds of counseling, they all have several factors in common. First, counseling is a professional relationship between at least two people. This means that a professional counselor offers therapy to another. Professional counselors have dedicated themselves to their education and their practice in order to be able to provide their clients with knowledge and counsel that is designed to help them.

Second, counseling is organized around the principle of helping others reach their goals. Everyone has goals. For some, that means being a better partner to their significant other, or a better parent to their children. To others, their goals are about achieving a new level of success at work. No matter what your aspirations are, a therapist has the keys to help you unlock your full potential while uncovering and removing the obstacles that have held you back in your life.

Sometimes goals are less concrete than professional success or happier relationships. If you have had a hard time coping with a life change, whether that be a marriage, a divorce, a death, or an illness, you may not know exactly what a reasonable goal is. It could be as simple as saying “I want to feel better.” Whatever your goal, a professional counselor can help you identify both the underlying problems that are holding you back, and they can help you plan out a map that can get you where you want to be.

If you are ready to take the first step towards the life you want to live, call Gray Matters. I will set up an appointment so we can discuss what your goals are and begin the journey that will get you there.

Do I Need Counseling?

There is no hard and fast rule about when someone should see a counselor for therapy, but if you feel lost, hopeless, helpless, confused, angry, or empty, counseling may help.

Lots of people deal with problems every day without professional help from a therapist or counselor, but just as many people struggle to make sense of their lives or to make forward progress on the changes they would like to see in themselves. It is important that you don’t compare yourself to others when you are considering therapy. What is important is that you are doing everything you can to help yourself. Just because someone puts on a smile does not mean that they are happy or that you can “power through” like they can. Our society places a premium on “manning up” and “being tough” instead of being honest and open. Ignoring or denying that a problem exists rarely ends well, though; repressing negative experiences or pretending that you don’t have feelings will only make you feel worse over time.

Many people have feelings or thoughts that they don’t wish to burden their friends and family members with because these thoughts are mentally taxing or challenging to consider. After a life-changing event, it is completely normal to reevaluate your life and the way that you look at the world. When a relationship ends or someone you love passes away, a piece of who we are goes with them and we are changed. Sometimes, it seems as if the way that our world looks and feels changes when we lose something or someone who is important to us.

You don’t have to deal with these changes alone. A counselor can help you talk about your new reality, they can help you better organize your thoughts in order to change the way that you feel about the world and yourself, and they can help you get back on the path you want to be on or forge a new one.

Call Gray Matters in Simi Valley today if you think that counseling could help you. My practice is about helping you meet your goals, whether that means developing a plan for professional success or working to control your depression or anxiety.

Counseling For Depression

Nearly everyone will experience depression at some point in their lives, but if you have been dealing with long bouts of depression, or your depression is extremely severe or comes on without an obvious trigger, it may be a good idea to speak to a counselor.

Depression that arrives following a (usually negative) major life event like a death, a divorce, or some other form of trauma, may go away on its own, but in many cases, it does not. People tend to push their feelings down, especially if they believe that they are feeling things too acutely or for longer periods of time than others. This can cause these episodes to last for much longer than they would have if they sought treatment, and it can worsen other mental and physical health conditions.

If you feel depressed even though nothing external has “caused” your depression, it can be an issue of brain chemistry or other external causes that you haven’t considered. Working with a counselor can help you better manage many of your symptoms.

Counseling For Grief

Grief is unquestionably one of the most difficult feelings that any person will ever deal with. While it is easy to believe that grief is simply amplified sadness, it is far more complex, challenging, and destructive than sadness. Even when you lose someone who has been ill for a long time or an elderly friend or relative passes, you will be shocked by how many emotions come to the surface and how difficult it can be to process those feelings.

Losing anyone is painful, but losing someone you care about unexpectedly can create a whirlwind of seemingly contradictory emotions and thoughts that can make anyone feel as if they are caught in a rough sea. During a period of grief, waves of memories, emotions, and thoughts can crash through your mind with an intensity that is difficult to fathom.

Contact Gray Matters today to set up an appointment. I want to give you an outlet to express your feelings in a safe, non-judgmental space. Therapy is an important step for anyone to take if they are having difficulties adjusting to their life after the loss of someone. While there is nothing that can bring back what is missing, it is possible for you to find ways to both honor those who are no longer with us and continue to live your life.

Counseling For Relationship Problems

While this is the page for individual counseling, it is important to speak about counseling for relationship problems. While I do provide counseling services for couples and families, it takes work on behalf of individuals to improve relationships.

For some people, seeing a therapist alone allows them the freedom and safety to discuss their feelings without worrying about being judged or losing esteem in the eyes of their significant other or family. If you want to work on problems that you believe start with you, counseling can be the ticket to a happier life and more fulfilling relationships with others.

Counseling For New Parents

Postpartum depression, as well as relationship problems, are not uncommon after the birth of a child. For most new mothers, postpartum mood swings, unexplained crying episodes, and trouble sleeping, usually subside after a week or so. Postpartum depression is when those feelings persist for a month or more, or if they become very severe.

It is vital that you know that this is nothing to be ashamed of — there was nothing you could have done that would have prevented this from happening. Postpartum depression is not an issue of character or mental toughness. As a new mother, your body has undergone a tremendous amount of change and trauma since your pregnancy began, and these physical changes have had side effects that manifested as a mental issue.

Call my office in Simi Valley to schedule an appointment if your postpartum depression symptoms have been going on for more than two weeks. Counseling, along with treatment from your physician, can help you process and overcome these feelings.

Counseling For Career Issues

Your career is important to you. Whether your career is your lifelong calling or something that you have grown into, it is important to acknowledge just how much of an impact our work can have on our mental health. Most people spend at least 40 hours per week at their job. This is not an insignificant factor in your life.

For some people, stagnation at work may be caused by external factors like a lack of experience or education, personal issues with management, or a failing company. For other people, their lack of success or their inability to transcend their current station may be due to a mental block. This can be a complex web, and it helps to have a professional counselor help you untangle it.

If your career is not as fulfilling as it used to, or if you can’t make the next step up the ladder, call Gray Matters in Simi Valley. I have spent a lot of time working with professionals in many different fields in order to give them the tools they need to examine where they are, figure out where they want to be, and prepare a path to what they see as their future.